MY MOTHER'S NOTE BOOK: The Sound of Angels Wings

The summer of 1976 marked the beginning of a two year extended furlough for my parents due to my dads continuing health problems.
As the two year extended furlough came to an end so did 30 years as missionaries to Mexico.
The doctor felt it not wise for them to return to the damp climate in the village and the high altitude of Mexico City.

Their ministry, however, did not end there as they continued to serve in various capacities, primarily with the influx of refugees in the early 1980’s and others attempting to learn the English  as a second language as well as Bible classes.
In 1988, life appeared to be going great in their cozy little apartment in Castaic.  Mother was a teachers aid at the local school and Dad was the apartment manager.

The Apt. In Castaic

They had just celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary with a trip down to Mexico for two and a half months which they had thoroughly enjoyed.
The local fire department, being around the corner from the apartment, one day, rushed my dad to the ER with a heart attack.  The Lord was gracious and spared his life with no lasting affects after 20 days in the hospital to resume life back to normal with new appreciation for God’s hand in his life.

The 2nd Story Apt.

I saw how my mother cared deeply for Dad during this time and I am sure she wondered if she would lose him.
I saw how this may have deeply influenced the choice of poems in her note book and the Bible.

1987, Ready To Celebrate the 40th Wedding Anniversary

I found the poem “The Sound Of Angels Wings” to be one of those poems.  The context for copying this is unknown to me, however, Dad did tell me that when Mother found something that was particularly meaningful to her, she would write or copy it somewhere.
I believe this poem sounds resonant to those who have lost a loved one although it is in the context of a spouse.

Washing Clothes By Hand In Mexico

THE SOUND OF ANGELS WINGS~Norma
                                                           Rupp
                                                           
It happened so suddenly.
Our lunch-table conversation so ordinary.
Then in an instant,
Without warning,
The face of my beloved
was drawn and pinched.
Time stood absolutely still.
(How often “tomorrow” fills
our speech but the time comes
when there are no tomorrows
at all.)
The words of the doctor,
after endless waiting;
A turn for the worse.
How can that be?
He is my life.
I am not whole without him.
Finally they let me see him,
touch him,
kiss his beautiful face.
Another room, more tubes,
more machines, more waiting;
His eyes respond to me and
tell me that his love is
deep and eternal.
His fingers grasp my hand
and squeeze as I whisper,
“I love you”.
We will fight this together,
He and I.
We will win.
Other battles in our many
years together have been fought
and now,
now they seem like nothing.
Friends came to comfort
and encourage and
I am grateful.
God is able, and I am
finding that is true.
But as I enter his room
and see his dear sweet face,
I seem to hear the gentle brush
of angels wings,
And my heart knows that
for this battle, God has
another victory in mind.
The surrender does not
come easily.
It is not easy to let go
of my beloved,
even into the loving arms of God.
I want to keep him
here with me always.
But it is not to be, and
the angels are anxious to
get on with the work
God has sent them to do:
transporting my beloved into
the presence of his saviour.

He is home now.
The angels are rejoicing.
Love ones gone on before
are rejoicing
are enjoying a great reunion,
and my husband is beginning
his new work in Heaven.
But I am finding
that surrender is a daily task,
not a once-for-always
commitment.

The pain is so incredible,
The pain of not hearing
people speak his name,
of no more “ordinary”
lunch-table conversations.
No more verbal or physical
reassurances of his love,
no more hearing his key
in the lock.
No seeing him walk
across the lot to our back door.
The pain of loneliness,
because half of me is gone.
Yes, the “better” half.

Lord help me
in this surrendering.
Your grace is sufficient,
you are truly trustworthy.
Thank you for giving him
to me for all these years.
Thank you for the
beautiful memories.
Thank you for the sound
of angels wings.
Thank you for the knowledge
that you are God,
and your way is perfect
always.